Lemons to Apples

They say that when life hands you lemons, you should make lemonade. But who would want to drink lemonade?

I say that if life hands you lemons, you should throw those lemons into the trash and demand apples. Because everyone likes apples.

Now you know.

Anyway, I’m here today to tell you all a story about a girl we all think we know. Her name should no doubt be familiar to you. (If not, then go sit in a corner and read your Harry Potter books. The rest of us have more important things to deal with.)

Her name is Tanya Shinnok.

Or is it?

Here’s what we know about her so far…

  1. She was born on July 28, 1994 in New York.
  2. Her parents are Raven Shinnok and Lucy Dengonatti
  3. She has four brothers named Arthur, Spencer, James, and Trevor, and one sister named Tallulah
  4. Her best friends are Mara Llewellyn, Stuart Greer, Irene Haughton, and Pearl Tanner
  5. Her relatives include her uncle Shad Shinnok, aunt Janine Hall Shinnok, and cousins Shara, Aaliyah, and Rufus Shinnok

Now, let’s back up for a second and go through the details of the list…

  1. We don’t have any proof that Tanya was born in New York. In fact, anyone could claim to be born in New York, despite the fact that your birth certificate could say that you were born in a backwater town in the state of Missouri.
  2. I don’t have any reason to believe that Raven or Lucy were Tanya’s parents at all; not just because of the absurdity of the idea, but because how do we know that Tanya is really their daughter? I mean, anyone could claim that a child is theirs; that’s why we should have DNA testing.
  3. Raven was not married to Lucy; in fact, they never met. He was married to a woman named Carol Hartford and they had Arthur, Spencer, and James. Still no word on the mother of Trevor and Tallulah.
  4. Tanya really did hang out with Mara, Stuart, Irene, and Pearl, but only until the fifth grade, when she went to San Francisco.
  5. Tanya and Shara were friends, and their friends were Maddy Haroldson, Scott McAllister, and Jacquel Rassenworth. No word on if Tanya knew Shara’s family or not.

So, if the first list about Tanya was the lemons, then the second list is the apples. We don’t have to take what others tell us at face value; for all we know, they are lying to us. We don’t need lemons; we need apples.

Anyway, back to the article:

If Tanya Shinnok isn’t real (as this article is claiming) then who is she? What was her real name? Who are her parents? What was she doing in Harrison Creek and San Francisco?

And the most important question of all…where is she?

I’ll be back as soon as I get some answers to these questions.

~This article was written by Trey Manning